Feeling Vulnerable

Tonight, I’m feeling extra vulnerable. I know I have to make myself vulnerable in order to grow. Even still, it hurts when people – those who claim to be friends and those who have never met me go out of their way to attack me. I like to guard my family, my friends and my emotions from harm. So, it doesn’t go down easy when my open arms approach is met by swords and daggers.

As a pageant director, I take a lot of abuse. From many that I have helped and from plenty who have never met me. I don’t know what it says about them but as a human with a heart, I will say that it hurts me. I love being a pageant director and you can ask my husband …….I don’t do it for the money! I love giving women the opportunity to enhance their purpose and expand their reach in their communities, across their state and around the country. I don’t hide behind message boards. I don’t try to take down the competition.

There’s enough room in every state for International, United States, America, Galaxy, All American, Beauties of America, and on and on. So, I hope that we can give all of the directors a break. There’s no need for drama. No need for criticism. We do things different and that’s what separates us – not what makes one better than the other.

I know that by making myself vulnerable to all I have been able to touch a few. That gives me comfort even as I continue to struggle with opening myself up to unwarranted attacks. The next few months will be about prayer and self exploration. Is it worth it? Do I want to continue to put myself and my family through this? Maybe……………

Why Walk When You Can Strut

I mean who doesn’t want her own theme music right? In my mind, there is always a Beyonce song playing when I walk. As a result, I have a confidence and attitude that comes across when I’m walking, on and off stage.

These are the things that are missing when you see a contestant “fall flat” onstage. She may have a great wardrobe and hit all of the Xs on the stage but without confidence AND attitude, she might as well crawl. Confidence helps you to believe that you are already the winner – no matter what the judges say. Attitude lets you work the crowd and the judges. It’s the wow factor or that thing that makes the audience gasp when the light hits you.

Of course, you have to temper confidence and attitude based on the category of competition. Are you a fun loving gal who loves her body in fitness? Or are you the next Heidi Klum or Tyra Banks when the music starts for fun fashion? Or are you the Belle of the Ball in evening gown who knows that everyone wants to be her but you only want to be with the one you love? It’s important to know your part before showtime. Don’t hold back in rehearsal. If you do, you’re likely to miss the mark when the real show begins. A $5000 gown or $3000 fun fashion wear is just a heap of material if the girl in the clothes is a shrinking violet.

In the words of Tim Gunn, you’ve got to “Make it Work.” Now find your theme song, put in on your mental Ipod and rock the runway – on and off stage.